Back To School

Being back to school really kind of shakes me up, nearly being 14 I’m still working out what to do with my life and I’m not quite sure. But I don’t know about you but school is a difficult time at the moment, I thought of some topics and I’m going to talk them through.

1. Bullies
Okay so bullies are quite a big thing at my school, I’m not going to go through saying what a bully is because you all know that, I used to be bullied when I was younger for the stupid topic of my surname, it was rude and people found it funny. I’m just going to put out there, I can’t change my surname yet and I’m stuck with the one I have, so those stupid idiots that thought it was cool to make my life hell at the age of 10. Well it isn’t!!! This only carried on for about 2 weeks which I’m lucky I had the guts to tell a teacher I trusted what was happening, and if any of you are or have been bullied just talk. Talk is easier than you think it is. Once those bullies realise how stupid they’ve been they will stop. (Most of the time)
Some form of bullying consists of the bully being jealous of the victim, they obviously have better friends, maybe more money and smarter. Some of those boys and sometimes girls that hang around the fields and playgrounds all day skipping class, mouthing off to teachers and not doing anything with there life are the types (in my experience) are the ones that go down the bullying route. They are simply jealous that your doing so well and there not. Just either talk to that person and tell them how your feeling or talk to a parent or teacher! See, all the resolutions involve talking! 🙂

2. Self Harm
Okay, so i don’t know about your school/collage but in mine there are a lot of self conscious girls that find the need to hurt themselves. A lot of my friends are self harming and it’s really hard to watch them suffer.
I wish there was more I could do for them, but they make it difficult for me to get to them. I don’t know if any of you have or know anyone that does self harm but if you do and they need some help don’t hesitate to get them the help they need, because one of my friends needed help and I had to choose whether I wanted to see them suffer or tell there parents and them get better even though she was mad at me for quite some time. A lot of girls are insecure about there weight and if I had a wish it would be for all girls to stop thinking there fat and be happy with there bodies.

3. Boys

So this is a topic that I’m no good at, boys confuse me so much I can’t even explain. There body language is so confusing and when they take and hour to reply to a text, say hey then don’t reply again, they don’t realise how annoying it is. There is a certain boy that I have liked for a while now, he has noticed me and we flirt and talk a lot but he never seems to be interested. I don’t know whether to make a move or not. It’s kinda hard to know what a boy is thinking whereas you can read girls like books. If you have any tips on how to get a boy to be interested or anything I’d love to hear them.

So that was my intake on back to school, it was short and sweet as all my blogs are but its a little something so you can get to know me a bit more. I do have a YouTube channel where I do talking videos like these blogs. So do go and check that out.
I’m sure your wondering a bit why I started this when I don’t have one topic just to talk about? Well because I’d been hurting recently if you’ve read my blog you would know, and I just thought I could get a bit of advice, give a bit of advice and just write everything down where I can still see it without having to hide it from my friends and family. I will write again tomorrow

Scared dancer x

Dance

So I’ve just got home from dance, sorry this blog is so late, I will try to make them earlier. It was my first day back to school today and it was so tiring. My next post tomorrow will be about back to school. For now it’s going to be about the thing that frees me and motivates me. This is how I got through life when things were tough. Dance.

I love to dance in every way, mainly ballet though, I’m getting a place in the Royal Ballet school and the 2nd auditions are really soon. I’m really excited about that, and I will be able to dance until my heart is content. The only problem is, my parents hate the fact that I dance, they want me to do some manly football or netball game. But I don’t want to? And I don’t know how to stand up to them about it. They shout at me as soon as I ask for a new pair of ballet shoes or the fees for it. I have to pay for that out of savings.

I use ballet as a excuse, to get out of the world. To be free. I use it to clear my head of all the exams and thoughts running through my head. It sets me free and I’m happy most when I’m dancing. I just feel talking about it on a blog, even though not many people are listening, I just feel that it’s good to let it all out, and I enjoy to write so what’s better? Writing about what you love? Nothing’s better in my opinion.

I sometimes wish I could tell all my friends at school that I dance, I’m lucky the people at my dance don’t go to my school and are not in my year. I wish I had the guts to tell them? That’s stupid isn’t it? But I feel they will laugh, and I’m a really shy person and to have people laughing and mocking is the worst it can get. I dance everyday after school and on weekends so I don’t really have much time for anything social, my friends don’t really ask much about this because I’ve always kept things to myself and never been open about my thoughts. But that’s the way I like it. Now I’m older I kind of want to share my interests and hobbies with people. I’m not so ashamed of it any more. So any tips on telling your friends these things that are scary to do please let me know. I would love to hear what you have to say if you have ever been in this situation before and how to get out of a situation like this. I will blog again tomorrow, if anyone is listening.

Scared dancer x

My Mother

So I thought I’d better get straight to the centre of my life, so you guys can really understand everything.
That is my Mother. She is the main thing in my life. I look up to her, as any child would do. But the thing is a couple of months ago I found that I couldn’t do that anymore. She was diagnosed with breast cancer…
This changed my life, I was an emotional wreck and couldn’t go to school, couldn’t eat, couldn’t even move. It was just depression but it felt as my world was upside down.
Soon after I told one of my friends and she was so supporting and understanding I was so happy I could talk it all out.
But then of course my school got involved and wanted to know everything about it. I told them it was breast cancer because of her smoking and couldn’t say anymore. No one realised how difficult it was for me.
The school booked me a councillor which really helped and I started to talk to a few more friends.

Now with months past my mother still has cancer but is fighting it off and I’m stronger next to her now. My life got so easier when I told people, so if you have a problem at home, just TELL PEOPLE! It makes life a whole lot easier to cope with. Trust me.

I’ll write again tomorrow
Scared Dancer x

Introduction

Hey, Im not quite sure if anyone will be reading these but I still need to write it all down somewhere. I thought of a diary but it’s two easy too lose and I want to keep this blog completely private and anonymous. I have a lot to write about I will be writing about it daily hopefully. If you do read any of my blogs and have any advice please comment and let me know some suggestions.

Okay, Here’s an bit about me without giving my identity away.

Im a 13 year old girl and I live down in Devon, my life is pretty ordinary and I enojy it that way. Obviously being a teenage girl I do feel excluded from my friends at times and get jealous pretty easily when the boy I like goes for my best friend. But that’s normal right?

Anyway that’s just a little introduction, I don’t know if anyone will read these but if you do find them enjoying please do tell me.

Scared Dancer x